How to ask a girl out?

What happened to the girl that was around you that your current girlfriend got jealous of?

Just curious.

She got jealous of multiple girls, regardless, all of them has quit MS, lol. Speaking from personal experience, I, as a guy, also get jealous. It's human-nature, nothing to be ashamed of.

Is the girl in any of your classes? Sit next to her if you can, talk to her about stuff so you guys can get comfortable around eachother. And then that leads to everything else.

smartass never heard of prostitution has he?

Prostitution isn't a true relationship, and it often ends in a one night stand that makes you wonder why you even paid the girl to get laid in the first place.

Also, I think Johnny is to young to hire a prostitute.

I guess all is lost then...

You're just defeating yourself. You gotta believe you can do it. Practice in front of a mirror or something. Think about what you're going to say before you go to bed.

If you really want to give up before even trying, it shows that you don't belong in a relationship. I believe that a relationship really is about the other person, not about you. What could you possibly do to make the other person feel loved? That is, what could you do to make her comfortable enough to make her love you back?

If you can't even make the first step, let's say you succeed because the girl is a wimpy girl. Then you can't do anything for your girl and you'll eventually fall apart.

Contrary to what you may be thinking, asking someone else isn't a "one time thing". Rather, you ask her, whether she accepts or rejects, life still moves on, and she'll forget it eventually. Assuming you two were originally friends, your friendship will resume.

Furthermore, asking someone else can only benefit you. If she accepts you, then you will be happy. If she rejects you, then you know that even if you had succeeded that maybe you two wouldn't have been successful anyways, so it would prevent you from going into a flimsy relationship. Either that or she's just not ready, and maybe in the future, maybe never, if she realizes that she is ready to be in a relationship, you would become her first choice.

Anyways, good luck with this. I hope you do succeed, though I don't think you really are ready for a good relationship.

Is the girl in any of your classes? Sit next to her if you can, talk to her about stuff so you guys can get comfortable around eachother. And then that leads to everything else.

No it doesn't. Often times, you're not the only one to be talking to her. Really, by doing that, you're leaving the choice up to the girl, which often times isn't very controlled, nor plausible if you honestly do want a relationship with the girl. If Johnny really wanted the girl, he shouldn't leave it up to chance to determine his fate. Rather, he should grasp at his opportunity when he can.

You're just defeating yourself. You gotta believe you can do it. Practice in front of a mirror or something. Think about what you're going to say before you go to bed.

If you really want to give up before even trying, it shows that you don't belong in a relationship. I believe that a relationship really is about the other person, not about you. What could you possibly do to make the other person feel loved? That is, what could you do to make her comfortable enough to make her love you back?

If you can't even make the first step, let's say you succeed because the girl is a wimpy girl. Then you can't do anything for your girl and you'll eventually fall apart.

Contrary to what you may be thinking, asking someone else isn't a "one time thing". Rather, you ask her, whether she accepts or rejects, life still moves on, and she'll forget it eventually. Assuming you two were originally friends, your friendship will resume.

Also, asking someone else can only benefit you rather than not. If she accepts you, then you will be happy. If she rejects you, then you know that even if you had succeeded that maybe you two wouldn't have been successful anyways, so it would prevent you from going into a flimsy relationship. Either that or she's just not ready, and maybe in the future, maybe never, if she realizes that she is ready to be in a relationship, you would become her first choice.

Anyways, good luck with this. I hope you do succeed, though I don't think you really are ready for one.

No it doesn't. Often times, you're not the only one to be talking to her. Really, by doing that, you're leaving the choice up to the girl, which often times isn't very controlled, nor plausible if you honestly do want a relationship with the girl. If Johnny really wanted the girl, he shouldn't leave it up to chance to determine his fate. Rather, he should grasp at his opportunity when he can.

Its not that I don't want to, I realllllllllllllllly do.

The truth is im not afraid of what shes gonna say, Im afraid of what other people are going to say..

Who CARES what other people have to say? What right do other people have to judge you? Why should you live according to what people have to say about you? Why should you submit to conformity?

I...Honestly dont know. I know that I shouldn't care but I do. I really need help to not care. Please help.

I really need help to not care. Please help.

I don't think you need help for this. You just need to stop following herd mentality. If you want rationalization though, eventually everyone you know of is going to get into a relationship, whether they are willing to accept it or not.

In addition, you could manipulate this situation to your advantage. The more bold you are with your peers, the more your confidence will seem to grow. Girls like confidence. If the girl that you are to ask out sees that you have the confidence necessary to stand up for your own ideas, then that's a plus for you.

I don't think you need help for this. You just need to stop following herd mentality. If you want rationalization though, eventually everyone you know of is going to get into a relationship, whether they are willing to accept it or not.

In addition, you could manipulate this situation to your advantage. The more bold you are with your peers, the more your confidence will seem to grow. Girls like confidence. If the girl that you are to ask out sees that you have the confidence necessary to stand up for your own ideas, then that's a plus for you.

hmmm i guess youre right. I'll do it when the times right.

Is it normal to pay a girl to go out with you, seriously?
Maybe pay someone to go on a date with you to look good, but never to be in a relationship.

All aboard the fail boat, much?
The relationship I'm in now...
We met on Nov. 26th which was our first real date, but we actually met a few nights before. Went out on quite a few dates, didn't start in a relationship until the 19th of December. So a few weekend dates, then when I asked her out, in person like you should always do, she told me to wait until she was ready, and then she was ask me (which is perfectly okay, superiority-complexed males).

I don't think you need help for this. You just need to stop following herd mentality. If you want rationalization though, eventually everyone you know of is going to get into a relationship, whether they are willing to accept it or not.

In addition, you could manipulate this situation to your advantage. The more bold you are with your peers, the more your confidence will seem to grow. Girls like confidence. If the girl that you are to ask out sees that you have the confidence necessary to stand up for your own ideas, then that's a plus for you.

Manipulation and relationships should never be mentioned in the same breath. I highly doubt your negative attitude here is helping with his situation.

For Johnny -
Pretty much the best thing to do is to talk to her, hang out with her, try to be around her. Don't stress it too much, just let things happen naturally. If you dwell on it too much, it shows, and it creeps people out. Just be yourself, relax, and things will either fall into place or they won't. If they don't, just move on - it's hard, I know, but continued attempts at someone who has made it clear that they don't want to be with you will only push you farther away from them.

Tldr - Don't stress it, you're young - let things happen naturally, and any resulting relationship, friends, lovers, or otherwise, will be much more rewarding.

Manipulation and relationships should never be mentioned in the same breath. I highly doubt your negative attitude here is helping with his situation.

For Johnny -
Pretty much the best thing to do is to talk to her, hang out with her, try to be around her. Don't stress it too much, just let things happen naturally. If you dwell on it too much, it shows, and it creeps people out. Just be yourself, relax, and things will either fall into place or they won't. If they don't, just move on - it's hard, I know, but continued attempts at someone who has made it clear that they don't want to be with you will only push you farther away from them.

Tldr - Don't stress it, you're young - let things happen naturally, and any resulting relationship, friends, lovers, or otherwise, will be much more rewarding.

You practically just described falling into the friend zone and then said things might come out of it. That's exactly what I said =P. Anyways, Harrison is right about one thing, confidence is key. However, confidence doesn't mean being full of yourself, nor does it mean being a prick. There is a fine line, don't cross it, or you just look like another pimento in a sea of assholes.

As for whether other people look at you in a negative light because of this, ignore it. That's the best advice I can give. People will always be judgmental, it's in their nature. To me, if I don't respect someone, their opinion has little to no bearing on me. Once someone earns my respect, their opinion counts.

You practically just described falling into the friend zone and then said things might come out of it. That's exactly what I said =P. Anyways, Harrison is right about one thing, confidence is key. However, confidence doesn't mean being full of yourself, nor does it mean being a prick. There is a fine line, don't cross it, or you just look like another pimento in a sea of assholes.

As for whether other people look at you in a negative light because of this, ignore it. That's the best advice I can give. People will always be judgmental, it's in their nature. To me, if I don't respect someone, their opinion has little to no bearing on me. Once someone earns my respect, their opinion counts.

Friend leads to either close friend or relationship, or stays at friend (casual). What I was trying to say (but probably got muddled up) was that if you don't know the person well, the best way to scope out how they feel about you and vice versa is to spend some time with them. How you spend that time affects whether you go towards close friends or relationship. Just don't stress or rush things and you'll do fine in most cases. If you seem to be getting negative responses, don't push, just quietly back off without making a big deal of it.

Manipulation and relationships should never be mentioned in the same breath.

How can a relationship work without manipulation going on? Maybe the connotation is wrong, but all of our behaviors manipulate the surroundings in some way.

I highly doubt your negative attitude here is helping with his situation.

What negative attitude? If you're only posting this to display your attitudes towards me, this is not the place to do it, the Pits of Hell is a more appropriate forum to rant.

Pretty much the best thing to do is to talk to her, hang out with her, try to be around her. Don't stress it too much, just let things happen naturally. If you dwell on it too much, it shows, and it creeps people out. Just be yourself, relax, and things will either fall into place or they won't. If they don't, just move on - it's hard, I know, but continued attempts at someone who has made it clear that they don't want to be with you will only push you farther away from them.

That's not very good advice. Things don't happen on their own, as I had mentioned earlier, following this method is the equivalent of leaving everything to chance. Also, the latter part on moving on has already been mentioned.

Anyways, Harrison is right about one thing, confidence is key. However, confidence doesn't mean being full of yourself, nor does it mean being a prick. There is a fine line, don't cross it, or you just look like another pimento in a sea of assholes.

I never talked about being a prick or an pimento. I merely said that should Johnny support his decision to court the girl, rather than shy away in order to conform to the norm of his school (which apparently is "stay away from the opposite gender"), then he will seem like a much more confident person, which is a bonus.

Truly people who can't accept who you are and what you believe in are the pricks.

As for whether other people look at you in a negative light because of this, ignore it. That's the best advice I can give. People will always be judgmental, it's in their nature. To me, if I don't respect someone, their opinion has little to no bearing on me. Once someone earns my respect, their opinion counts.

So you're saying that even if someone has the best decision that anyone ever designed, you're going to just toss it away only because THAT particular person made it?

I'm not saying that my ideas are the best, but why should you let something as trivial as this soil your perceptions?

Friend leads to either close friend or relationship, or stays at friend (casual). What I was trying to say (but probably got muddled up) was that if you don't know the person well, the best way to scope out how they feel about you and vice versa is to spend some time with them. How you spend that time affects whether you go towards close friends or relationship. Just don't stress or rush things and you'll do fine in most cases. If you seem to be getting negative responses, don't push, just quietly back off without making a big deal of it.

If she ends up being a close friend, so be it. Close friends are worth something too. (I think I'm restating rather than disagreeing, lol.)

Forcing something to happen never works.

Who CARES what other people have to say? What right do other people have to judge you? Why should you live according to what people have to say about you? Why should you submit to conformity?

Because people want to be popular. People tend to easier fall in love with popular guys.

How can a relationship work without manipulation going on? Maybe the connotation is wrong, but all of our behaviors manipulate the surroundings in some way.

What negative attitude? If you're only posting this to display your attitudes towards me, this is not the place to do it, the Pits of Hell is a more appropriate forum to rant.

That's not very good advice. Things don't happen on their own, as I had mentioned earlier, following this method is the equivalent of leaving everything to chance. Also, the latter part on moving on has already been mentioned.

I never talked about being a prick or an pimento. I merely said that should Johnny support his decision to court the girl, rather than shy away in order to conform to the norm of his school (which apparently is "stay away from the opposite gender"), then he will seem like a much more confident person, which is a bonus.

Truly people who can't accept who you are and what you believe in are the pricks.

So you're saying that even if someone has the best decision that anyone ever designed, you're going to just toss it away only because THAT particular person made it?

I'm not saying that my ideas are the best, but why should you let something as trivial as this soil your perceptions?

First, what I said had nothing to do with any previous issues I had with you - those are in the past. Don't turn this thread into an argument, he wants help, and that's the easiest way to ensure that he doesn't get it. As for manipulation, the essence of the word is to exploit something in your favor in attempt to get what you want. Relationships revolve around choice and compromise, not working things to your advantage.

Second, my advice was meant to encourage him to not push things too fast or too far, and had nothing to do with letting things happen on their own (I said naturally, meaning don't put undue pressure on things, not sit idly by and wait). If you read, you'd see that I advised to spend time with her, and to let that time shape how their friendship or relationship might develop in the future. A relationship may not be the best thing they could have together - so, while I was trying to encourage him to go for it and spend time with her, date her, etc, I also wanted to make it clear that things don't always work, and not to be heartbroken if they don't.

First, what I said had nothing to do with any previous issues I had with you

K.

As for manipulation, the essence of the word is to exploit something in your favor in attempt to get what you want. Relationships revolve around choice and compromise, not working things to your advantage.

If you bothered reading what I said, I said he could manipulate his peers. I didn't say he should manipulate his girlfriend. Also, I said that "I believe that a relationship really is about the other person, not about you."

Second, my advice was meant to encourage him to not push things too fast or too far, and had nothing to do with letting things happen on their own. If you read, you'd see that I advised to spend time with her, and to let that time shape how their friendship or relationship might develop in the future.

Spend time with her. Yes, while that leads to friendship, it's merely chance that such a friendship would grow into love.

Let's say you're just a normal person. Undoubtedly, you will have friends, many of which are girls. Now how many of those girls love you (as in true intimate love, not love as in "since you're my friend I must love you")? Some of them? A fraction of them? One?

Essentially, it boils down to chance and if it does happen, then he would have spent so much more unnecessary effort than had he just asked her out properly the first time.

^ Except spending time with someone you like isn't "so much unnecessary effort". For one thing, if that's not enjoyable, it's all not worth it.

Then again that doesn't seem to be the context of this thread. I would recommend, if the thread starter is in high school or below, for him to just drop it. It's most likely a waste of time even if he succeeds; and if it really isn't (which is not unheard of), what I say is powerless anyway. Heh.

^ Except spending time with someone you like isn't "so much unnecessary effort". For one thing, if that's not enjoyable, it's all not worth it.

Then again that doesn't seem to be the context of this thread. If the thread starter is in high school or below, I would suggest for him to drop it. It's most likely a waste of time even if he succeeds; and if it really isn't (which is not unheard of), what I say is powerless anyway. Heh.

I've seen some successful post-high school relationships, but yes, many don't work out. Anyways, tldr of this thread is go for it, ask her to go to a movie or coffee shop or puttputt golfing or something silly and lighthearted and fun. Make her laugh, but don't try too hard. Have fun, be yourself, and hope for the best.

Have fun, be yourself, whip it out and hope for the best.

Fixed.